You People Make My Brain Hurt!

Posted by Sherry , Monday, April 12, 2010 Monday, April 12, 2010

Wow. You people need to take a blogging break so that I may maintain what little sanity I have left.

So many of you are BIG THINKERS. And you need to give me a break. Because in the last 17 months, my brain has become quite squishy.

Elmo and Desitin are the reigning themes in my life right now and the most philosophical questions I encounter all day are often “should we have peanut butter or grilled cheese for lunch?” and “how dangerous can it REALLY be to eat dog-food? Surely she will survive”.

So when Catherine starts blogging about what I shall coin “food-freedom,” and Drazil is pontificating on the effects of damaged family relationships and Amy starts suggesting that she has eaten “a lot” because she finished off AN ENTIRE CHICKEN NUGGET, my poor little head starts spinning.

Someone please start singing the “ABCs” or “Itsy Bitsy Spider” so that I can go back to my happy place.

In all seriousness though, I am so grateful for all these provoking blogs and of course and as always, for Oprah. Because, combined, they have given me some things to ponder. Which, in turn, takes my mind off of the white chocolate peanut butter bark beckoning me from the fridge.

I always knew that Oprah and I were somehow 'connected' and not just because we both love to dramatically announce the entrance of a new person to the room “Welcome, SHEEERRRYYY's BLOOOGGGG!” (key audience applause).

See, today I was catching up on some of Her Majesty's episodes and the one with the woman who lost like 175 pounds and then gained it back and then lost it again was on. And I know that some of you saw this episode, commented on it and are now talking about that Women, Food and God book and that is all well and good.

But what struck me most about this particular episode was how during the interview with this dieting woman Oprah QUOTED me. Uh-huh. I said it.

I would say that she PLAGERIZED my blog but I'm pretty sure if you say ANYTHING negative about Her Highness you are immediately whisked off by men in black coats and sunglasses and are forced to watch Dr. Oz pull out every human organ from a corpse. And then he makes you touch them.

I'm paraphrasing here but what she said is that she was just incredulous at how much TIME she has wasted dieting and thinking about dieting and fatness and feeling guilty about eating, hating her body. If you go back to my very first blog, you will see that I SAID THAT FIRST..... (Still love and worship you Oprah! Hugs!)

One of my goals for my life post-band is to finally reach Food Freedom. Food Freedom is where food is simply nourishment AND enjoyment and not guilt, anger, sadness, prison. Food Freedom is where I'm not scrutinizing my body with no mercy every minute of every day.

Food Freedom is like the Garden of Eden for fat people. There are candied apple trees and Frito bushes but we do not feel compelled to strip bare the vegetation and then ask Eve where the milkshake river is located.

There are a few of you in my blogosphere who have 'made it' to this place. It seems happy there. I want to get there. To me, that is paradise.

Ok, so now that I've totally exhausted my brain cells THINKING BIG (or at least 'bigger'), I'll fill you in on the nitty gritty of my last week.

I am feeling some restriction. Technically, I have none in there but maybe there is still some swelling because I definitely am eating about a ¼ of what I used to eat daily. And pretty much all of what I am eating would be considered 'mushy' or at least 'soft foods' except for a few crackers here and there.

I miss salads and sandwiches (especially Panera's Chicken Ceasar -- do you think it misses me too?) like the dickens but haven't been back to the doctor yet so thus, have not been given the 'all clear' to move forward.

My scale is still very unfriendly (and has beady little eyes too!) and I'm stuck at a 9 pound loss. I read Keelie's blog today and the lucky duck lost 6 pounds in one week. WTF?! She is lucky that I do not live near her or I may be compelled to use my leftover easter eggs and go all Picasso on her house.

I am considering a vlog in the future but am not sure how one goes about that, exactly. Luckily H is a computer genius and should be able to walk me through it.

I just hope that you all enjoy hearing about Sesame Street and poopy diapers....What? Do I hear crickets?

17 Response to "You People Make My Brain Hurt!"

DB Says:

Too Funny! I feel the same way - my blog doesn't have enough substance - it makes my head hurt! I love your blog by the way & this was a great post :).

Theresa Says:

You are so funny! Oprah steals thoughts from me all the time. And I so remember when my life was all about the little ones. Good times!

Amy Says:

You rock! And my head is spinning right along side yours. You cracked me up about my chicken nugget episode. At least I can laugh about it, because my thinking is definitely EFFED UP right now!

FTR, I want to take a trip on an innertube down that milkshake river with a giant straw. And since it's liquid, I could handle it right now, too tight or not! ;)

Jen Says:

So funny! I love how you write.
I hope you find your food freedom/garden of eden soon. I've snuck across the border a few times to visit but kept getting picked up by immigration. I'm currently waiting on my green card so I can become a permanent resident.

Sherry Says:

@Jennifer -- I AM LAUGHING MY ASS OFF! You are to funny.

workinprogress Says:

Love reading your blog :-)

Ahhh.... nice to know someone else is living my life!

Anonymous Says:

Love this post, you are right about food freedom, we are all seeking it.

CC Says:

the itsy bitsy spider went up the water spout...


Camille Says:

I've seen the Wiggles episode that is on right now so many times it makes me physically ill. I've prepared food and placed on a divided plate, cleaned up finger paints, and saved the cat's life twice so far. SOOO feeling you!

♥ Drazil ♥ Says:

OH GOD - Camille said the Wiggles. Save me now. And um - I do not pontificate - I ramble, incessantly and you love it - I know you do. Seriously though - I'm all for some Sesame Street - I'm so sick of me and my own deepness I could throw up! Smooches!

Jess Says:

Yo Gabba Gabba is balancing all these big blogger thoughts for me.

Keelie Says:

Hi Sherry!
I am an art teacher so I WOULD love you to go Picasso on my house. ha.

I can't believe O quoted you and didn't give credit! I would not stand for that. :)

Per your comment on my blog about skinny people trying to get skinnier...I guess there are different ways of looking at this topic. Yeah, if someone is a toothpick and all they ever talk about is how fat they are, etc. then I have no sympathy for them either. Makes me want to puke.

What prompted my whole post was actually another bandster's post about how she felt judged for being banded when she "only" weighed like 205 pounds. People always asked her why and made her feel like that wasn't big enough...

It just made me realize that we have really strayed a long way from reality if we think soemone has to weigh like 300 lbs to be justified in wanting to change their body.

I'm sure you can agree with that?

Thanks for beign a part of my blog.

Catherine55 Says:

You really hit the nail on the head with "food freedom!" :) I love that phrase -- and state of mind, but I hadn't thought about it quite that way until you posted that comment about "freedom from the food prison." Really hit home for me. That's definitely an item for the "pro" list. :)


P.S. Twinkle twinkle little star! :)

Nella Says:

FOOD FREEDOM! I like that!

Jenny Says:

Just found your blog thru BOOBS! Can't wait to follow you!

SuperMegaAnna Says:

I also just found your blog thru BOOBS! Looking forward to getting to know you!


Gen Says:

Food freedom truly is the Garden of Eden. I am there most days, and can't wait for you to make it there too!

How old are your kiddos?

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